FUNNY POEMES

Love Dress



The early days of wedded bliss
Held passion wild, untamed;
but with the passing of the years
This lusty fervor waned.
"We'll have to find a cure to stem
This indolence within,"
She thought, and then devised a plan
Her husband's warmth to win.

When he returned from work next day
And opened his front door,
Beheld his wife in naked pose,
He balked at what he saw.

"Good grief!" he cried, "Have you gone mad?
Are you in some distress?"
"My dear," she said, "look closer here,
For this is my Love Dress."

He gazed upon her naked form
Then took her in his arms,
Transferred her to the bedroom where
He yielded to her charms.

Their days took on a renewed glow
Now love had been revived;
She thought she'd tell her mother how
The marriage had survived.

"I wonder," mused her mother's mind,
"Would it be such a crime
To try inject excitement in
A marriage past its prime?"

Next day her hubby went to golf,
Came home a trifle sore;
He'd been in bunkers, in the rough:
A game one would deplore.

He climbed the stairs, the door flung wide,
He stood aghast with shame
To see the body of his wife
Quite starkers fill the frame.

"You stupid woman! Lost your mind?
Where is your modesty?"
"My dear, surprise! Look twice; this is
My Love Dress, can't you see?"

"Why, yes I can, and I concede
You've tried, without a doubt;
But I'd have thought the wrinkles, dear,
You would have ironed out!"










Copyright; Vivienne Ledlie
Email: ledlielv@bigpond.net.au











A Languid Cup of Tea










Your passion is my pleasure
Your desires served at leisure
Your hands coil round that treasure
Yes - a languid cup to sip.
In these tea rooms they bewail,
The lack of pies and rustic ale,
While all those ladies quiver frail,
For that slice of cake you bit.


You know I crave this most,
To spread butter on your toast,
Among the condiments to coast,
For that moment marmalade.
With those fine white pearly teeth,
You'll provide me with relief,
And restore my lost belief:
The crunch of teeth relayed.


You can reach across to grasp,
Biscuits firmly in your clasp
With a warm vivacious laugh,
By those lips moistly defined.
I would love to plant a kiss,
But such behaviour is amiss,
And would have me soon dismissed
From the table of your mind.



Copyright; Mir
Email: mlramaiin@aol.com
Web Site: http://www.geocities.com/miradw/page0.htm